Regret To Have No Regrets!

Sometimes we end up doing things that we wish we had never done. Other times we do every possible thing to get what we want and fail. Either way, the feeling of 'regret' arises and it varies on the situations and individuals experiences. There are healthy regrets and then there are the ones that lead to depression. My favorites are obviously the healthy ones. Really, I love them. They are like your strict, seeking for perfectionism, teacher. And then there are their bad twin; who will be hard on you but of zero benefit to you.

Lets have a peek on both the twins:

a. You have decided to look back at your past with a self-judgement lens and have rated yourself under 'to be improved' category. That is where corrective measures and actions come in action and you start to compensate for things that went wrong. The process is all about improving yourself via not repeating the past mistakes. These sort of regrets are healthy and necessary for your personal growth.

b. You have decided to blame yourself for things that went wrong and you keep beating yourself up unnecessarily and for an infinite period of time. There is NO end to your self-punishment and your idea of changing things that are beyond your control. These sort of regrets are very unhealthy and may lead to chronic depression and other forms of mental and health disorders. Watching the movie Manchester by the Sea makes you realize on how the guy having a choice to move on with his life decided to live with the regret of loss of his three kids for all of his life. 

Remorse, however big or small, is a part of human nature and absence of it is not human like. You may be regretting on succumbing to your temptation on having that Big Mac and you may have a remorse on how you missed out on your friend's big day when you could have made it. You may be regretting on doing things for the wrong people and you may be regretting on ruining a great relationship. You may be regretting on flipping at someone or you may be regretting on not helping someone out while you could. Be damaged by someone or damage someone, be hurt or hurt others - regret is bound to happen. Magnitude of pain and sorrow over something determines the amount of remorse. 

Turning a blind-eye on anything that has not happened in your favor or has happened in a way that has left someone affected because of you doesn't mean you decide to live in the moment - it actually means you are not ready to look into things deep enough. A healthy regret tells you if you owe an apology to someone or you need to be cautious of someone in future. It tells you if you need to give more time to your loved ones, especially after losing one or it tells you to start focusing more on your career on landing that perfect job after a ruthless sacking. It basically tells you to hold on to the lessons and move past your mistakes. It tells you to value things when they are in your hand lest you lose them for good. Can be your health, can be someone you love, can be your job, can be your behavior, can be your way of doing things so on and so forth. Oh deary, how it brings value to everything while telling you to keep looking into things deeply and carefully and keep judging yourself to an extent that you become a better person. 

No matter whatever your regret is, it definitely is a pre-requisite to your transformation - positive or negative; that depends on how you embrace things that should not have happened but have happened.

You are lucky to be regretting over something right now (in a healthy way) and even luckier to be working on it to save yourself from future regrets. Well, and if you are not regretting over anything, try'n look into things some more - what if it is hiding somewhere in some part of your brain box.

Bring it out - what if its as good as it gets?

Regret to have no regrets and call it a blessing in disguise!

About the Author: Believes in herself!